My theory about achieving one’s goals begins with knowing exactly what you want and why. The thing is that you’re not effective unless you’re wholehearted. This requires engaging ever level of your being simultaneously, so start with meditation.
Humans have a lot of layers. I tend to think of this in terms of chakras. Is your goal important to your very existence? That’s the first chakra. To your reproduction? To your status? How about to your heart? This is the most important, because it begins the focus outwards. Does what you want benefit the ones you love, so that your goal is compassionate rather than selfish. For chakras five through seven the questions are: does achieving this goal open or close communications? Does it fit with your understanding of the world? And finally and most importantly, does it aid the harmony of the world?
I also find that a lot of people want things after the fashion of spoilt children. They will desire the shiny toy or the sweet. It’s doomed to failure because it’s about making others provide. Noise and tantrums rather than personal responsibility. That’s, to my mind, trivial and boring. If you want something for yourself, do you want it because it makes you a better person or because you believe it will make you happy? If you want something for others is it truly to make life better for them or is it so they will be grateful to you? These are not shallow questions!
What you’re after doesn’t have to benefit each one of these areas of the psyche, but it has to be compatible with each of them. For example you may be attempting to take up a career which will be unpopular and decrease one’s status. The power chakra may not gain from this but it must be on side. You must fully accept and take on board the fact that people will think less of you for taking such a job. So this takes a lot of thinking through, meditation, and time. At the end of such a process I find that I’m energised and well focussed.
The eponymous hero of Hesse’s novel Siddhartha spoke of this level of engagement with a goal as being like a stone falling through water. Nothing can prevent it because the whole being has a single purpose. This is the first metaphor – how to achieve intrinsic focus.
The second idea relates to distractions. All sorts of things in the world can deflect you from your purpose. Some of these are fears, conditioning, and desire. But there is also the opinions of other people, especially loved ones, and cultural dispositions and tabus. Of course the most important protection from these is embodied in truly wholehearted focus. That doesn’t mean ignoring other people’s opinions, if only because doing so will enable them to sneak in under the radar. Instead listen and carefully consider any views you haven’t already taken into account. From this standpoint of open thoughtfulness it’s easier to keep all elements of the psyche aligned on the goal – or if changes need to be made then be properly aligned on a modified goal. Think carefully about changes though. Are they genuinely necessary or are they a matter of succumbing to fear or desire? I’m a firm believer in letting sleep and the unconscious help with decision making. Take the time to be sure.
When confronted by doubts, there is something worth considering which I was taught during motorbike rider training.
Focus on the way through the corner, not on the side of the road.
From time to time you need to flick your eyes away from the apex of the curve ahead. Set aside the time to meditate and consider objections. Examine why you don’t feel good about some aspect of your goal and either modify the goal or understand why sacrifices are necessary. Think about who it is that benefits from what you’re trying to achieve and who loses, and double-check that what you are trying to do is loving, harmonious, and wise. But those second thoughts take place in their allotted time; what’s most important is that at all other times you remain focussed on the goal rather than the problems. Difficulties are part of the path to the outcome. The solution to problems should in each case take you nearer to what you wish to achieve.
To strain the motorcycle analogy a little further think of the wholehearted attitude as being akin to leaning the motorbike into the corner. You use your whole mind body and soul to do this. But if you look too hard at the rock on the side of the road you will end up splattered all over it. Keep your eye on the place you’re going.